January 2010 Member Q&A: TomGray (Tom Gray)

Hi everyone! Well, here goes...

I am involved in autism as someone with aspergers syndrome and some associated sensory issues. I have six children, three boys on the spectrum and one daughter I strongly suspect also has aspergers. She's just way too much like her Dad! I also work as a volunteer with autistic people.

I already knew some of the Treehouse crew over on Facebook and heard about Treehouse from them. I think I was among the first to join, and regularly log in to read the posts.

My top tip would be don't panic. There is more and more information and support for your child than ever before, and for the parents too.

Oh boy, the most difficult was trying to explain to a ladyfriend that autism is NOT a mental illness and if I was the one with a mental illness how come she was doing all the shouting - because I am like Spock, like a robot I got told...and it just goes to show that there are those who will never quite get it.

Exciting. Eccentric. Frustrating.

I'd love to take my kids on a holiday to somewhere where there are wide open  spaces and few people, so that they can spread their wings and have fun without putting up with the inevitable taunts and unkindness they often get.

A desert island? My kids. Guitar. Matches, never was much of a boy scout.

I enjoy playing my guitar, music always takes me to a better place.

I work with a young lady (18) who is severely autistic and mostly non verbal. She can say half a dozen recognisable words that's all.  But after a year or so, I walk in now and she makes a quick smile and says "Tom" she does this every time now. I thought for a long time that I was making no progress with her, and I think this is her way of saying "actually I am listening".  That means a lot to me.

I'm not very well spoken really, which is the reason I like writing. I've never done it in any organised kind of way but often wish I could devote more time to it. I grew up surrounded by books and have always had a fondness for literature.

Thanks for the plug Josie lol :)

I can speak just fine, but I think it's because of the processing difference I find it easier to organise my thoughts and write them down.

You never know, there may be a book one day!

I have trouble using telephones, and in particular if I am talking to a stranger ar someone with a heavy accent. It's the whole processing thing again, and so my telephone manners might be a bit abrupt. My calls rarely exceed a couple of minutes, and I can't wait to get off the phone.

Unlike my teenagers...

Thanks for the info about Yurt camp, I will see if they have a website, maybe there are similar camps closer to us. My kids would love a place like that.

Duhhh! Yurts. Of course - I had forgotten what a yurt was. Thanks :)