Parenting skills for people on the spectrum
Posted by
Leanne
on 16th July 2010
at 13:06
Hi Ann,
There is very little advice on parenting skills whether you are on the spectrum or not. It is something that I have found completely bewildering.
Parenting a child on the spectrum is different to parenting a typical child and yet no one gives advice, parents are just left to get on with it.
When I complained to my sons paediatrician about it she was genuinely confused as to what I was asking for, so I very clearly said that I had received no help or guidance on parenting strategies and she said but you don't need them you are doing so well.. quite what other parents who aren't as lucky (as it is pure luck working out what works and what doesn't) do I don't know.
Anyway her and her bosses suggestion was for me to start a parenting group.. I was speechless.
Leanne - Community Champion
Posted by
Elena - former Community Manager
on 16th July 2010
at 14:31
Leanne, that is really an oversight on their part. Every time I hear things like this, I think of all those people out there who we aren't reaching...
Great topic, amberlight! I look forward to hearing what the others have to say.
Posted by
damo73
on 16th July 2010
at 19:27
Hello,
I think my parenting skills have evolved with my son (he is my greatest teacher) - yet also an amalgamation of all the best bits of other people (especially my own parents) - or the opposite of people that didn't 'work'. Luckily he is quite like me, so what 'worked' with me, generally does with him too. We have a fantastic relationship - which is extremely loving (although he struggles with the word). I am not sure there is a clear way to parent children on the spectrum as they are all so very different (my survey will be looking into this though - if you would like to take part?).
Damian - Community Champion
Posted by
amberlight
on 17th July 2010
at 17:11
A survey? I love surveys! Yes please.
Ann - Community Champion
Posted by
damo73
on 17th July 2010
at 22:28
Hello Amber,
I just need to 'iron things out' with Anna about a couple of things and then the survey should be ready.
I think it will be an interesting one to do.
Damian - Community Champion
Posted by
damo73
on 23rd November 2010
at 16:30
To add to the discussion:
Many people have complimented me on my parenting skills and remarked 'I wouldn't be able to be that amount of patience' or 'I would not be able to cope' etc. - although when faced with challenges, I often find that people will rise to them. Nothing is anywhere near as important in my life than my role as a parent and our relationship is a fantastic one.
Damian - Community Champion
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Posted by
amberlight
on 16th July 2010
at 12:36
I've been astonished by how little really good info there is on the web about parents who are on the autism spectrum.
Even some of the 'big names' (major charities) have very negative information about our supposed failures, weaknesses etc etc. And not a word of positivity anywhere.
As someone who is a parent to a teenage son and who gets on fantastically well with him, I get so dismayed when I read articles saying that apparently all our children end up in counselling because we're incapable of love and affection etc etc (no, really - some of them say this stuff!). Goodness me...when I asked our son, he fell about laughing at the very idea. And I know so many other parents on the autism spectrum who have found ways to make it work.
Thoughts? Especially since quite a number of parents of children with an ASC later find out they have an ASC too...