Help!
Posted by
damo73
on 26th June 2010
at 22:40
Why can't your boss step in and phone some of the bosses of these people to question what they are doing? As you are working with your boss, is it not his responsibility to help you? In what ways have these people been negative?
I'm may not be the best at helping on this topic, yet I hope things improve for you.
Damian - Community Champion
Posted by
amberlight
on 27th June 2010
at 19:09
Damian, thanks. Those are good questions, but so far the boss just says it's nothing to do with him. It certainly is his responsibility, yes.
Does anyone else here think they could cope with 25 different 'bosses' at once? With 25 different working styles and 25 different sets of expectations and 25 different sets of working rules??!
Posted by
Elena - former Community Manager
on 28th June 2010
at 09:43
Amber, I'll be the first to say that on the spectrum or not - that just wouldn't be fun for anyone!
I agree with Damian that your manager needs to drive this on your behalf. Is he aware that this might not be possible for you to organise and work through all on your own?
I also wondered if perhaps the people who have been negative about you just don't understand how to work alongside you yet. So on the positive side, if you and your manager can find a path through this then the outcome should be that everyone has an understanding which enables different types of people to work together effectively.
Posted by
Elena - former Community Manager
on 28th June 2010
at 09:44
Oh dear, I just realised I posted in the Neurodiversity Room and I'm not supposed to...hope you all don't mind, just wanted to lend a little hand. : )
Posted by
amberlight
on 28th June 2010
at 10:43
Elena, it's possible I'm not explaining myself very well.
Say in your job it's part of your job to contact the NAS and Mencap and various other big charities so that you are sharing info with them.
Would you expect Treehouse to say to you "every time you speak to one of these other firms or charities, we will take zero responsibility for you - we'll only be responsible for you whilst you're speaking to our own staff in the office". That's what they've said. If I'm bullied by any outside people, they said it's nothing to do with them at all, not even if it's part of my job to talk to those people. I'm supposed to negotiate my own safety with each charity they authorise me to liaise with.
Does that make more sense?
It's my own boss who has suggested this.
Posted by
Elena - former Community Manager
on 28th June 2010
at 11:24
It does make sense and doesn't seem like a very good way of supporting you...
Posted by
asteroids
on 29th June 2010
at 09:35
Hi Ann,
If it's part of your job to liaise with the other charities then I think it's reasonable to expect your boss to help with this. A suggestion: that you and your boss discuss this and draw up a letter explaining your role and some of the difficulties you have along with reasonable adjustments which the other charities can adopt easily. One very simple adjustment is for you to speak to a specific person within each charity, someone who understands your difficulties and who you feel comfortable with. The letter can be sent to each charity concerned.
Unfortunately, I have had similar experiences: I was an outreach teacher for a while and, as part of my job, visited children in various schools. One school took exception to me being there due to my autism and refused to allow me on their premises unless I had a support worker with me!!!! My line manager and union attempted to resolve this but it was never sorted out and I did not go back to that school to support students.
I have to admit that I find it unbelievable that the very charities who are supposedly supporting people with autism are also being so negative towards people with this disability. Sadly, I struggle with the same issues but not on the same scale as you.
Asteroids Sara - Community Champion
Posted by
amberlight
on 29th June 2010
at 13:26
Sara, I agree entirely with you that it's horrible that autism-related charities have some people within them who are awful to autistic people. Alas, it does happen. There was research showing that 1 in 10 workers in 'care professions' may be predators hoping to use that position to target the vulnerable. Most are never caught ,because the law is so poor for disabled people and gives us such hugely impossible 'hurdles' to get over to find justice. I've been working with the Crown Prosecution Service on some of this, to help them understand how impossible it can be to give evidence and attend a court case. I've done it, and I'd rather die than do it again. Honestly. So terrifying.
I'm so reliant on people helping me and supporting me in safe ways.
I'm total rubbish at working out who's safe in each separate organisation. I'd end up talking to every predator in there, because I think everyone is a friend... so leaving me to choose who is safe isn't a good plan for me. It's why I needed my boss to actually help make those choices for me and put in safeguards.
I've told them I'm taking three months off the work now to recover.
Posted by
amberlight
on 29th June 2010
at 13:27
Plus I'm faceblind, so even if I'm only supposed to speak to person X in a charity, I probably won't recognise them anyway so I'll end up speaking to different people by accident. Not easy...
Posted by
asteroids
on 29th June 2010
at 14:58
Hi Ann,
I'm also quite vulnerable because I'm far too trusting......so I get caught out too. There is a particular personality type which I clash with and this always leads to major problems. I have lost a lot of jobs as a result of this yet I still fall for it, every time..........even if I warned my support worker about it.
I hope the break allows you time to recover and gather your strength ready for the next challenge.
Asteroids Sara - Community Champion
![SiftGroups.com [opens in a new window]](themes/zen/treehouse/images/siftGroupsLogo.gif)
Posted by
amberlight
on 26th June 2010
at 21:17
Drat - I think it dropped the first attempt at me writing this. If it reappears perhaps the admin people can clear the other one?
I work with a major charity. I link with other groups and charities as part of my job. In some of those one or two people have been very negative about me because of me being on the autism spectrum, and it's scared me witless. My new boss says it's nothing to do with him and if I want any help for bullying, I have to go to each charity/group and get their people to help me. that would mean I deal with 25+ different safety representatives, and I can't. I'm autistic. I can't deal with that many people.
I don't want to lose the work - I love doing it, but I don't know what to do or not do. My advocate is trying to help, but she's not getting anywhere so far. Need advice from people on the spectrum, or not on the spectrum...